How we change what others think, feel, believe and do

The need to: Explain

Expertise | Appearing rational | So what?

Expertise

If we can explain something, we can claim expertise. This gives us two very useful benefits:

Control : If I am expert in something, then I understand it and can use that knowledge to control it.
Social position :Expertise is a form of power, that leads to other people looking up to me, either in admiration (or fear) of my power or in gratitude from the use (or not) I have made of it on their behalf.

Appearing rational

When we goof off or do something of which others might disapprove, we will desperately try to explain ourselves. Why is this? It is because we fear appearing irrational and hence being rejected by others.

Explaining demonstrates our rationality and enables others to predict what we are likely to do and hence not consider us a threat. There are often unwritten group norms about appearing rational and we will help our friends save face when they appear irrational for example by explaining how they are having a 'bad day'.

So what?

Gain credibility by demonstrating your own expertise in a topic of interest, but beware in doing this that you do not belittle or embarrass the other person too much.

Build friendship by helping the other person save face through your rational explanation of their failures and strange misdeeds (that you may have engineered).

It is perhaps unsurprising that there is a whole section on this website called 'Explanations'. This was created out of your author's need to explain and to help you satisfy your similar need. In practice, the whole site helps in various ways to explain what people do when seeking to persuade.

The need to: Explain

Expertise

Appearing rational

So what?

See also