Explanations > Motivation
> Kahler's drivers > Be Strong
Identification | Benefits | Problems |
Treatment | So
This is one of the five drivers originally identified in the field of
Transactional Analysis by Taibi Kahler. Here are some simple and useful notes on
- I must be invulnerable at all times. I must not cry or show any weakness.
cannot express emotions. I must help
others but not myself (I do not need help).
- Aggressive or
assertive attitude, demonstrating strength in attitude.
- Objective language, distancing themselves from their feelings. Avoids 'I'
language and any talk about emotions.
- Frozen face and body, hiding emotions.
- Will take on all tasks without complaint.
- Good for getting things done, especially in a crisis.
- Does not take things personally or get sucked into emotional situations.
- Generous, always helping others before self.
- Withdrawn under stress as they hold emotions in. Refusal to acknowledge they
- Bottled-up emotions that may explode outwards onto others or be held in and
do internal damage.
- Can get into 'who is the strongest' competitions with others, especially
those who also have powerful 'be strong' drivers.
- Expecting others to be strong. Contempt for the weak.
- Praise for consideration of the feelings of others.
- Put them in slightly vulnerable situations and praise their handling and
exposure of emotions. Only make them as vulnerable as they can handle without
going into Fight-or-Flight.
- Be considerate about their emotions. Show that you recognize them and that it
is ok for them to have feelings.
- Show them that they are not to blame for things, including their own internal
- Help them receive with good grace as well as give to others.
- Help them see where their strength appears as a threat to others.
Recognize these drivers in yourself and others and treat them accordingly.
Ellis' Irrational Beliefs,
Kahler, T. (1975). Drivers—The
Key to the Process Script. Transactional Analysis