How we change what others think, feel, believe and do

Silence

Description | Example | Discussion | See also

Description

Just sit silently.

This can be done with a passive or sympathetic air, as if waiting for them to confess.

It can also be done with more aggression, staring at the other person. In this case a staring competition may be invoked (which you must win). A way of keeping yourself calm in this is to stare not at their eyes but at the bridge of their nose.

This may be done without saying anything. It may also be done after creating some form of tension in the other person.

Example

After discussing the implications of the suspect not disclosing something, the interrogator sits quietly, looking at the subject and occasionally raising eyebrows slightly if the subject looks like they might be about to speak.

Discussion

Many of us are not accustomed to silences in a conversation and we will feel a tension that requires something to be said. This can lead us to speaking just to fill the gap. If we have been given something to consider, this may also increase tension to comment.

Aggressive staring can draw a naturally aggressive person into a staring match. When you win, then you will have won a competition and they may well feel defeated. This gives you the upper hand to ask further questions, to which they may well feel obliged now to answer.