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> Kahler's drivers > Be Perfect
Identification | Benefits | Problems |
Treatment | So
This is one of the five drivers originally identified in the field of
Transactional Analysis by Taibi Kahler. Here are some simple and useful notes on
- I must be perfect, wonderful, correct in every way.
- I must succeed in
everything I do.
- I must get top marks and win.
- Exact language, including qualification when they are not sure, such as
'probably', and absolutes when they are, such as 'absolutely'.
- Always neat and well-groomed.
- Never completely satisfied with what they do.
- Hard-working, with excellent quality output.
- May achieve great things.
- Fears of failure and losing control, and subsequent over-compensation.
- Over-work. Not finishing things for fear of criticism.
- Expecting others to be perfect too.
- Praise, including for less-than-perfect work.
- Reframing of what 'perfect' really means to 'enough'.
- Be very specific with criticism (and praise).
Recognize these drivers in yourself and others and treat them accordingly.
Ellis' Irrational Beliefs,
Kahler, T. (1975). Drivers—The
Key to the Process Script. Transactional Analysis