How we change what others think, feel, believe and do

Experiential Language

Techniques > Use of language > Persuasive Language > Experiential Language

Method | Example | Discussion | See also

Method

Describe how you are personally experiencing the things that occur around you.

Talk about what you are seeing, hearing or otherwise directly sensing, without further interpretation or analysis.

Explain also the more interpreted experiences. Talk about how things make you feel, whether it you feel happy, sad, angry or other distinct emotions.

You can talk about experiences in the past and the present. You can also describe how you think you may experience the future.

Link your experiencing to people and things in the world, showing the cause-effect relationship, for example how what others say and do affects you.

Example

I saw you take the book and am curious about what you would be doing with it.

When you say that I feel very sad. I've known other people say thing like that and it's never turned out well.

I am really looking forward to the holiday and the warm sun on the beach.

Discussion

One of the things that we often do in conversation is to guess what others are thinking, feeling and experiencing. Then, in the manner of how we interact with the world, we act as if these 'Theory of Mind' guesses are true. This can be confusing and annoying for those who are the subjects of this, as people seldom understand well exactly what others are thinking.

Experiential language has a particular power as only I know what I am experiencing, feeling and thinking. This means I can always talk with authority about myself. Others cannot deny what I say I have perceived or tell me what I am feeling or thinking. This can make experiential talk very useful.