The Secret to Letting Go of Every Fear
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The Secret to Letting Go of Every Fear
by: Guy Finley
Are you afraid of some condition in your life? Here's a life-transforming
secret: that seemingly scary condition, whatever it may be, is not the problem.
It is your reaction that is fearful. This is why if you will become conscious of
your condition instead of afraid of it, you will change forever your
relationship with fear.
It is only within this special kind of inner-relationship that there is real
safety, because now you are interacting with fear in an entirely new way. You
are no longer letting it dictate to you how to act or what to do. Instead, you
are aware of the fear. You are learning to quietly observe and study it. And,
each day as you practice this, you discover something new about the strange and
shaky nature of your own fearful reactions. They begin to lose their power over
Why? Because you are at last seeing these reactions for what they have always
been: unintelligent mechanical forces. You are slowly becoming stronger than
they are because by seeing them as they are--not as they would have you see
them--you have helped yourself to climb above and outside of their influence.
This self-insight is the difference between trembling through your life and
being in command of it.
To be consciously afraid means that you know you are frightened, but at the same
time you know that these very fears, as real as they may seem, are not you. And
no wrong reaction can keep you captive once you begin to see it for what it is.
Fear is, and has always been, nothing but a self-limiting reaction that we cling
to in the darkness of our present life-level, having mistaken it for a shield of
self-protection. But, just as the faintest of early morning sunlight can dispel
the night-long darkness, so does the smallest of insights into a persistent fear
lead to letting it go.
You can prove this powerful principle to yourself anytime you want. Just dare to
proceed even while being afraid. But remember, your new aim isn't to be
courageous or to try and act strong in the face of fear. No. We've seen that
this won't work. You simply want to be more curious about your frightened
thoughts and feelings than you want to believe in them.
If you will follow this simple but higher instruction, not only will you start
to see these habitual reactions that have been keeping you scared and running,
you'll actually start seeing through them. This is where the real miracle
Each new insight into the actual nature of these negative reactions removes some
of their power over you. And their loss is your gain. You are stronger now and
you know it. You also know this new strength will never fail you because it
isn't just the appearance of a temporary opposite. This new strength of yours is
the absence of an old weakness.
Let's look at just one of the ways in which this principle of putting
self-illumination before psychological self-protection can turn fear into
Do you know someone who you would rather run from than run into? Most of us do!
Nevertheless, starting right now, resolve never again to avoid any person that
In fact, go ahead and walk right up to that critical man or aggressive woman and
say or do exactly what you want instead of letting the fear tell you to do what
it wants. Have no ideas at all about the way things should or shouldn't go. You
are there to watch and learn about yourself, not to win an ego victory. Let that
person see you shake if that is what starts to happen. What do you care?
Besides, it is only temporary. That unpleasant person before you can't know it,
but you are shaking yourself awake.
For the first time, you are letting your reactions roll by instead of letting
them carry you away. As you stand there, momentarily apart from your usual self
and working hard to remain as inwardly watchful as you know how, you can see
that this flood of previously unconscious reactions has its own life story; a
shaky sort of story that up until now you had embraced as your own. But now you
are beginning to see the whole story. The fears do not belong to you. Here is
You have never been afraid of another person. The only thing you have ever been
frightened by is your own thoughts about that person. Yes, you did feel fear,
but it wasn't yours and it wasn't towards someone stronger than you. The fear
you felt was in what you thought he or she was thinking about you.
Amazing isn't it? You have been afraid of your own thoughts! And seeing this
ends this. Now you can let this thought-self go, because no one consciously
holds on to terror.
(Excerpted from The Secret of Letting Go, Llewellyn, 2007)
Guy Finley is the acclaimed author of more than 30 books and audio programs on
the subject of self-realization, several of which have become international best
sellers. His popular works, published in 16 languages, are widely endorsed by
doctors, professionals, and religious leaders of all denominations. Among many
others, his popular titles include: The Secret of Letting Go, Design Your
Destiny, The Lost Secrets of Prayer, Apprentice of the Heart, Let Go and Live in
the Now, and The Essential Laws of Fearless Living. Finley is the founder and
director of Life of Learning Foundation, a nonprofit center for self-study
located in Southern Oregon where he gives talks four times each week. Visit
http://www.guyfinley.org for a wealth of
free helpful information, free audio and video downloads, and to request your
free Self-Improvement Starter Kit.
Published here on: 28-Jun-09